Blackmail?

Everyone’s getting very hot under the collar as they say we are suggesting if we don’t get a good trade deal from Europe we won’t co-operatewith them  on security issues. People are suggesting that’s blackmail. So we sent the Home Secretary Amber Rudd out to bat, in the form of an interview on Sky News. And what does she go and say? I’ll tell you – ““If you look at something like Europol, we are the largest contributor to Europol. So if we left Europol, then we would take our information – this is in the legislation – with us”. 

That hasn’t calmed anything down I can tell you. Honestly how did I end up with such a team of hopeless idiots…

An air of repose

So some little,twerp of a Labour MP was banging on about when the £350 million a week was going to be going to the NHS, everyone in the House of Commons  got heated and then that little rat of a Speaker laid in to me and declared of me that there was “an air of repose about the fellow”. All I was doing was keeping my head down, which I find is the best strategy when questioned about any of the fibs we told (see the Fibs page for more details!)

Today’s the day! 

A day that will go down in the annals of British history as we give notice to leave the EU.
I have been asked to explain how this fits in with what we said about this in the Leave campaign brochure, which said “Taking back control is a careful change, not a sudden stop – we will negotiate the terms of a new deal before we start any legal process to leave” 

Um, um…… got to go now, someone is at the door..

One more day

Our glorious leader is on form. Here she was today: “Tomorrow we begin the negotiations to secure a new deep and special partnership with the European Union. As we do so I am determined we should also seize this historic opportunity to get out in to the world and to shape an even bigger role for a global Britain. This means not just building new alliances but going even further in working with old friends who have stood alongside us for centuries.”

Get out in the world and shape an even bigger role for a global Britain- I wish I had said that! I wonder what it means and how we do it?
Never mind – I’m sure it will turn out fine…….

Immigration

Old Dopey Davis has let the cat out of the bag. Pressed on immigration and whether it would reduce on last night’s Question Time, all he could do was waffle  “What it will be is whatever the government judges to be sustainable.”
Truth of the matter is we haven’ t got a hope of reducing immigration to any significant degree and we wouldn’t want to anyway.
Someone remind me why we thought Vote  Leave was a good idea?

Rose tinted glasses?

Our glorious leader is off to see that Scottish woman again. And on her way she announced to the world that “Leaving the European Union will be an opportunity to strengthen the ties between the nations of the United Kingdom”. I am not sure that the Scots will see it quite like that, still less the Northern Ireland lot. I think she’s been spending a bit too much time with Dopey Davis and Feeble Fox while I have been on my travels. Better have a quiet word with her…

Pot,kettle,black!

I se our glorious leader, writing in the Times today about those pesky Scots, said
“The SNP is trying to force the UK Government to agree to something that is fundamentally unfair to the Scottish people. It wants to ask them to make a crucial decision without the necessary information. They would not know what the new partnership with the EU would look like, or what the alternative of an independent Scotland would be”.
Well call me thicko but isn’t that what we’ve just managed to get the entire UK electorate to swallow, hook line and sinker?
Pot – kettle – black springs to mind but I better not say so
I am going to keep my head down and hope it blows over!